Healing the Black Family, Healing the Black Nation

September 26, 2017

 

Over this past weekend, I've seen a lot of negative posts concerning race, nationality, country, civil freedoms, respect, and or lack thereof respect. I like everyone else have my opinion on all of it and here it is my two cents sort to speak. Take it or leave it, hate it or love it here it is raw and from the heart, no sugar coating no apologizes. 

Alpha- in one of its common definitions means something or someone being first. So that is where I will begin my assessment of self-healing of the Black community. For purposes of eliminating more divide amongst ourselves, I will be referring to people with melanin and origins from Africa as Black. Yet another senseless argument that we have amongst ourselves. "I'm Black", "I'm African American", "I'm a real nigga", I'm just American, I ain't never seen no Africa, I'm from Detroit", "I'm Hotep" All senseless arguments that cause divide.

I would be remiss not to throw my brothers and sisters in the conversation who share this gift called melanin that often times have issues with identifying with us as brothers and sisters and us with them that we exclude them or they exclude themselves from us. Yes, you are Black too. . . "I am Jamaican", "I am Somalian", "I am Nigerian" as I said for the sake of melanin inclusion when I say, Black, I am addressing all of us!

I have digressed, Alpha: meaning first: The first thing we must do in my opinion is forgive and build. The Black Man must forgive himself for dropping the ball in this thing called life. And that can take form in many different ways varying from situation to situation and individual to individual. Forgive himself for failing the Black Woman, his children, and his community. He must reclaim the mantle of the head of household and lead his family into emotional stability and financial freedom. He must earn the right again to be looked upon as the leader of his family, and a force to be respected not only in his community but also outside of his community. 

Men, you know what your individual faults are: Perhaps you have been lackluster in helping to provide and care for your kids make an attempt to change it. Perhaps you have never truly learned to build, to care for or guide a woman. Make a conscious decision for self-improvement in these areas.  Learn to give back, become a mentor the time that you give back will mean the difference in a child's life it may be the deciding factor on the scales of life if he ends up in college some day or in prison. 

The next step will fall on the woman: accept forgiveness and demand accountability not only of your men but also of yourself. Once again this will vary from situation to situation but the core of the problem is communication, acceptance, and growth. Raise your standards of what you expect from a man, the I don't need a man mantra is false and it doesn't work, you do need a man and he needs you. The children and the Black community needs you both. It is balance not only in life emotionally and mentally but also financially how do we expect to build as a nation if we can't build as a family?

I could go deeper but I won't just wanted to drop some tidbits for my Black people to think about and to think about how they can apply it to their daily lives. Thanks for taking the time to read my first offering that will be posted once a week until next week this is Straight Talk From the Heart With Antwan Floyd Sr.

 

Excerpt from TA-NEHISI COATES interview from The Atlantic-

 

There is nothing uniquely evil in these destroyers or even in this moment. The destroyers are merely men enforcing the whims of our country, correctly interpreting its heritage and legacy. This legacy aspires to the shackling of black bodies. It is hard to face this. But all our phrasing—race relations, racial chasm, racial justice, racial profiling, white privilege, even white supremacy—serves to obscure that racism is a visceral experience, that it dislodges brains, blocks airways, rips muscle, extracts organs, cracks bones, breaks teeth. You must never look away from this. You must always remember that the sociology, the history, the economics, the graphs, the charts, the regressions all land, with great violence, upon the body. And should one live in such a body? What should be our aim beyond meager survival of constant, generational, ongoing battery and assault? I have asked this question all my life. I have sought the answer through my reading and writings, through the music of my youth, through arguments with your grandfather, with your mother. I have searched for answers in nationalist myth, in classrooms, out on the streets, and on other continents. The question is unanswerable, which is not to say futile. The greatest reward of this constant interrogation, of confrontation with the brutality of my country, is that it has freed me from ghosts and myths.

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